Ten Types of Teachers:

In honor of the first day of school, ten types of teachers I have known:

  1. The Mumbler: heaven help you if you have him or her for Trigonometry.  Especially if Trig is first period.
  2. The General: We will take this hill of knowledge!
  3. The Intellectual: I should be writing a book, you know.
  4. Mrs. “They don’t pay enough for bus duty and to grade your homework: Here’s your test back from last year.”
  5. Mr. Monotone: So sleepy…
  6. The Stand-up: I wanted to be a standup comedian, see, but I’m not that funny, so I became a teacher so everyone would have to give me a courtesy laugh.
  7. Mrs. Powerpoint: I want you to see my brilliant slides, so not only will you have to see them in class, I will email them to you.
  8. Mrs. Sugar: “You are so adorable!  We’re going to have so much fun today!”
  9. The Drill Sergeant: “You think this course is tough?  Wait till you are in the real world solider!  Now drop and give me 20.”
  10. The Hipster: I have an piercings, tattoos, and a ponytail.  I really should be living in Brooklyn, but even it’s not cool enough.  So I am here, blessing you with my coolness.
  11. Mr. “I should have retired five years ago.” I hate being here.  I hate the administration.  I hate this subject.  I hate you.  I hate your mother and father for having you.  I hate everything.

And to all the teachers out there – I know none of you fit these stereotypes!  Praying for you to have a great year! (and did you catch my mistake?)

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